Is January Over Already?!
Welcome to 2007. What took me so long to get here?
Well, the one thing I like about being a . . . hmm. What is a nice way of putting this? A "non-over-acheiver" like me is sometimes it bears rewards.
Back in the ex-mas rush of things, I asked the Jman to keep an eye out at Costco (R) for the Stitch-n-Bitch calendar or pretty much any calendar he could get at a reduced price. Of course, he completely forgot about it until I mentioned an LA SnB-er said she had found the SnB calendar at a Silverlake $0.99 store.
Well, he's been looking out.
And he found some.
And I told him to buy as many as his little allowance would allow, which is all of 7.
So. The first six people to make me pee in my pants from some wiseacre remark in comments will get the extries. If you're a WeHo SnB-er, great. Even if you're not, I'll mail it out to you. 'Cuz that's how I roll.
In the completely conceivable case I don't even get 6 comments, I'll bring the balance to the next WeHo SnB I attend, and let you guys scuffle over them with all the finesse of an attendee at Filene's Basement Annual Bridal Event.
Oh, and BTW, I *HATE* this new Google-based Blogger.
posted by MonkeyGurrrrrl @ 5:14:00 PM
11 Comments:
Well, since I am not clever enough to come up with something on my own, I will contribute this video: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=136101437706176785&q=spiders+on+drugs&hl=en
Oh and the Filene's Basement bridal event scares the crap out of me. Honestly, those girls arm wrestle, pull hair, and claw the eyes out of other girls for the chance try on ugly dresses that probably don't fit. Gee, sounds like fun. Except not. And how nice will they look in their wedding pictures with large clumps of hair missing?
Oh, re-heheheeeeeeallly? (ala Ace Ventura)
Doooood... if you send me one, maybe I won't hug you the next time I see you. No promises though.
A string and a piece of yarn walk into a bar and order a nice refreshing beverage from the bartender. The bartender looks at them both and says "We don't serve your kind in here. You'll have to leave." Not knowing what else to do, they slip around the corner to the restrooms. The string tells the piece of yarn, "Looks like we're in a bind here." "Never fear", says the yarn, "follow my lead". The piece of yarn takes his little yarn hands and ties a knot at the top of his head and at the tips of his toes. Then he rubs the ends of the knot until they are fuzzy. The string follows suit, but is confused as to what the piece of yarn has in mind. They both walk back to the bar and again order drinks. The bartender says "Say, aren't you that piece of yarn I told to leave earlier". "Nope" says the yarn, "I'm a frayed knot."
A string and a piece of yarn walk into a bar and order a nice refreshing beverage from the bartender. The bartender looks at them both and says "We don't serve your kind in here. You'll have to leave." Not knowing what else to do, they slip around the corner to the restrooms. The string tells the piece of yarn, "Looks like we're in a bind here." "Never fear", says the yarn, "follow my lead". The piece of yarn takes his little yarn hands and ties a knot at the top of his head and at the tips of his toes. Then he rubs the ends of the knot until they are fuzzy. The string follows suit, but is confused as to what the piece of yarn has in mind. They both walk back to the bar and again order drinks. The bartender says "Say, aren't you that piece of yarn I told to leave earlier". "Nope" says the yarn, "I'm a frayed knot."
I want to win! But I am not funny this early in the morning.
ENTERTAINMENT THIS MORNING NEWS:
Publicists for actor Johnny Depp report that he is leaving long-time love Vanessa Paradis and returning to the United States. When asked why this change of heart, Depp replied, "Because I know my soulmate is out there. Probably in Los Angeles. She's got huge breasts, curly brown hair, and she's probably knitting right now. Ah...if she likes Monkeys, all the better." Stay turned for more on Depp's Quest for Breasts.
How about this?
A man approached what was certainly a bad car collision. It seemed that a bus had been hit by a truck belonging to a major company. Lying about on the ground were a dozen bus passengers. The man asked one of the passengers. "Has anybody from the insurance company been here yet?" The passenger shook his head from side to side. The man went on, "Good, then you don't mind if I lie down here next to you!"
Hah! Those are some fairly funny replies, Monkeygrrl.
I, too saw the SnB calendar at our very own 99 cent store on Wilshire near Fairfax! I only picked up one for myself...they had quite a few in stock.
What I like about it is that the patterns and tips are totally new and cannot be found in any of the SnB books!!!
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I don't need a calendar, but I had to join in on the fun. Almost all of my jokes are long, so here's one of the short ones:
"With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week.
Larry LaPrise, the man that wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died peacefully at the age of 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him in the coffin. They put his left leg in... and that's when the trouble started."
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