Gin. Knitting. Monkeys. What more could you ask for?!

20 April 2006



If you were trying to take Fairfax last nite, I have to apologize. Apparently, my colleagues at Crack House Row decided to have a party.

For those not familiar with the area, Fairfax is a major thoroughway from the 10 freeway to points north, such as the Farmers Market, Canters Deli, Sunset Strip, etc. And it's a challenge on most days (inexplicably varying between one and two lanes in either direction). It's a great road to take when you're NOT in a hurry, and want to window shop, admire the great Ethiopian restaurants, see what's new at the LACMA, etc. Well, last nite it was impassible. Traffic was blocked north of Pico and south of Pickford, putting us smack dab in the center of the police perimeter.

Like the true loser I am, OF COURSE I had to check it out from the roof of our apartment building.

It was kinda cool, being up there with the airship, seeing all the cruisers sectioning off our neighborhood. [Ed. disclosure: I was once on the list to become an LAPD officer. I passed the written and physical tests, got 105% on the verbal (didn't even know that was possible!!) and was very excited at the prospect, but I think they dissed me b/c I'm, well, nuts. This was right around the time of the Rampart scandal, so I guess I maybe wasn't such a good candidate.]

At least it was purty.

I could see my office building!! HI, OFFICE BUILDING.

It didn't take long for a crowd to form out in the street. I swear, the only time we really talk to our neighbors is when we're on lockdown or have a power outtage. It takes the weirdest things to get us out of our cocoons. No one knew what the trouble was, but we could tell the po-po were focused on one building in particular.

Being complete LOOOOOOZER that I am, I got right up in their bidnez. Taking pictures. Sorry for the (lack of) quality, but y'know, LAPD isn't real thrilled with people taking their pictures while they're working. Go figger. So once it began to get dark, I didn't take pictures so much. That flash is bright, and I'd hate for one of the officers to think it was a muzzle blast. . .

But I did have to document the idiocy of LA drivers. HELLOOOOOO!!!! You are travelling northbound, when a major artery is blocked, you're diverted west, and you take the FIRST NORTHBOUND SIDESTREET YOU CAN FIND?! Especially one that is COVERED with brake lights and lookie-loos (like me)?!?!?! Okay, even if you're one to do that, when you see the people on the street telling the drivers to slow down and turn around b/c the road is BARRICADED, do you still go waaaay too fast on the waaaaay crowded street, while talking on your cellphone? And then, when traffic gets backed up, you honk your horn? If you do, I'm sorry. I can't love you.

[Another Ed. Note: I got my undergrad degree in psychology. This would have made for a lovely paper.]

Although, I had to admit - there was one woman who impressed me. Despite being one of the aforementioned idiots, when she had turned around and was heading back down the street, she made a comment to me and 2 of my neighbors (who are both big, male and unsavory looking), about how she's just trying to get home, and why we shouldn't be getting so much amusement at their expense. With her little girl voice and her doll-like features, I almost felt compelled to respond, but my neighbor (who is a much more patient man than I could ever be), explained to her. He was going to tell her the easiest way to get to where she was going, but she sped off without listening.

After two hours, the canine unit and SWATcifers came out with one kid in cuffs. I think they were still doing a door-to-door, but it was past the wee Monkegurl's bed time, and I'd neglected her enough.

Of course, we still have no idea what the whole thing was about. At a minimum, five T-Rex's died to fuel the heliocopter, and countless man hours were used with the perimeter and the search, but did we even get a mention of it on the news?!

No sir. It's commonplace for Crack House Row, and I was the only one there with a camera.


At 1:53 PM, Blogger miss kendra said...

"If you do, I'm sorry. I can't love you."

i loved this. it's very you.

and also me.

please move near me for your and the wee monkeygurl's safety.

At 4:18 PM, Blogger Tami said...

If it weren't for citizens like yourself, the real news would never truly be known!

Moment of silence for the 5 T-Rexes that gave their lives for the fuel of said copter...

At 7:13 PM, Blogger purldiver said...

One night at Dodger Stadium, it was LAPD night. In honor, they had a helicopter fly-by before the game started. I was like, "This is special? This is every night at my house."

At 10:30 AM, Blogger Darcy said...

It's a jungle out there, Monkeygurl! You would've made a good cop but then you are too friendly with a great smile and that is not desirable for an officer, at least not the ones I see around town.

Ps.Your dresses are en route to New Orleans today. Yay!

At 12:23 PM, Anonymous laurie said...

Now, see, it's a post like this that makes me fall in love with you ;)

I myself am fond of capturing the moment on camera. After all, if one lives near a crackden and one is not personally a crack fiend, one should at least get a good story to tell!!

It was AWESOME seeing you last night :)

At 5:34 PM, Blogger Laurie Ann said...

I love that you pointed and laughed at the idiots.

Please tell me you saw ER when you got home from SnB. It featured monkeys.

At 5:51 PM, Blogger MonkeyGurrrrrl said...



Well, I'll just have to catch the re-runs, b/c I was launderin' when I got home.

But WHAT A GREAT CROWD at the SnB!!!!!

At 10:15 PM, Blogger Anonymous Midwest Girl said...

Ha, I LOVE that you documented all this. I would have totally done the same thing.


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